Many people are afraid to explore anal sex because they hear it’s painful, or that you’re going to poop everywhere. But if we were educated on anal sex as we are other types of sex, this stigma wouldn’t exist, since all sex has the potential to be painful and susceptible to natural bodily functions and fluids.
The fact is that we aren’t taught about anal sex at all. As a result, those who are curious will turn to porn, arguably the most accessible resource for sex on the internet, as education. The problem with that is, porn is not created for education, it’s entertainment. A lot of the prep and care that’s required for anal sex is cut because it’s not all that exciting to watch. As a result, when we do try to engage in anal sex with porn as our only resource, mistakes are made.
It’s unfortunate (but not all that surprising) that nowhere in our country’s sex ed are our bums so much as mentioned as a source of sexual pleasure, despite it being exactly that. It’s quite a powerful one, too. So let’s fix that. Consider this a long overdue education on the booty-tingling pleasures of anal sex.
The best way to comprehend how anal sex works is to first understand your anal anatomy and how it functions, so let’s start there.
Let’s begin with the anus, which most will casually refer to as the “butthole”, or “hole” for short. For many, this is the only area of our anal anatomy that we can see, and it contains a great number of nerve-endings that are incredibly responsive to stimulation. It’s why rimming and anal massage have become so popular.
One of the most important parts of our booties to know, at least when it comes to anal sex, are the sphincter muscles, as this is where most will experience resistance, and in some cases discomfort or pain, when engaging in receptive anal intercourse. Because this area is so susceptible to injury, it is important you exercise these muscles through dilation methods, which we get to later.
Beyond the sphincter muscles is the rectum, an eight-inch chamber connecting the colon to the anus. It is the road through which stool must travel before it is evacuated through the anus.
The rectum is the area most toys and penises will reach (though some larger toys and penises may venture deeper), and it accommodates much more than the sphincter, meaning once you’re beyond these muscles, the penis or toy has much more room to play in. This is one of the reasons why many anal toys tend to be wide in the middle and have a thinner neck. This way, wearers can experience the blessed feeling of fullness without putting much strain on the sphincter muscles.
It’s important to note that stool is not contained within the rectum, rather the sigmoid colon, which sits above it. This means any stool that a penis or toy might come in contact with will likely be minimal.
Since our sphincter muscles are exactly that, muscles, we need to treat them the same way we treat the others when we expect optimal performance: through training. Because this is such an important, albeit tedious, process, you may want to invest in an anal training kit. By the time you’ve worked through the expertly curated Anal Training & Education Set by b-Vibe, you should be fully prepared for anal sex.
The Anal Training & Education Set contains three butt plugs of gradual sizes: a small plug, a medium vibrating plug, and a large weighted plug. So not only will you be working through bigger sizes as you train, you’ll be experiencing different sensations as well. The set also includes a reusable anal enema, if you choose to douche before engaging in anal play, as well as a lubricant launcher, b-Vibe’s handy Complete Guide to Anal Play, and a discreet travel bag.
When you begin dilating, start with the smallest toy in the set, and apply a lot of water-based lube to the toy and the anus. A tip: place a towel underneath your bum so the lube doesn’t stain anything. To make things all the more comfortable, use the lubricant launcher to coat the rectum as well. If you want to help relax the sphincter muscles prior to penetration, place the second toy in the set against your anus, and let its vibrations massage your sphincter muscles and help them relax.
Then you’re going to want to insert the toy very slowly, as little as a centimeter at a time, ensuring that you’re comfortable until it’s fully inserted. Try pushing out with your hole as you push the toy in. Once it’s in, move the plug in and out of your anus to get the sphincter muscles used to this active motion. You should aim to do this about 10 times, roughly three times a week. As you get more comfortable, feel free to increase these numbers until you’re confident that you can handle the next, larger sized toy, and repeat.
The Snug Plugs from b-Vibe are another fantastic tool when dilating, as there are seven different sizes you can work through at your own pace. The Snug Plug 1 is roughly the size of a finger, whereas the Snug Plug 6 weighs an impressive 515 grams and has a girthy diameter of 2.2 inches.
When using the Snug Plugs to dilate, carefully insert the lubricated toy into the anus until it’s at the widest part of the toy, and flex your sphincter muscles roughly 10 times. Remove and repeat with the same frequency mentioned prior with the Anal Training & Education Set, and move to the next sized Snug Plug when you’re comfortable. If you manage to work through all seven, consider yourself a pro.
If at any point upsizing becomes uncomfortable, go back to the smaller size toy. Any pain is your body’s way of communicating that you just aren’t ready yet, and in no part of this process should you ever experience pain. Some discomfort, however, can be expected from time to time.
Eventually, you’re going to see that your bum is capable of comfortably receiving larger and larger toys, and it’s truly a joyous experience. Maybe one day you’ll want to take your training to the next level and work through b-Vibe’s Anal Education Set: Masster’s Degree Edition.
BUTT WHAT ABOUT POOP?
Yes, poop happens, but it’s hardly to the degree of which you’ve likely heard. As mentioned prior, most toys and penises won’t reach the area that stool is stored, called the sigmoid colon, because that area is eight inches inside the rectum. Not to mention, it’s closed off by a valve called the rectosigmoid junction.
Everyone engaging in anal sex should understand that “mess” can happen since poop comes from the same area that we’re actively penetrating. It’s no different from encountering some urine, blood, or other fluids during vaginal sex. So first and foremost, don’t shame or make a scene should poop make an appearance.
While there is no way to guarantee a mess-free experience, there are some things you can do to minimize the chances of it occurring. One is by making sure you are consuming plenty of fiber and water. Since most of us don’t come close to our recommended daily intake of fiber, it might be a good idea to take supplements if you want to have anal sex more regularly. Fiber will ultimately make the stool bulkier and more absorbent, so when you have a bowel movement, fewer remnants will remain in the rectum, it also makes douching a much quicker process.
Some people like to douche prior to anal sex as a preventative effort to ensure the rectum is empty. To do this, fill your douche bulb with lukewarm water, insert the tip into your anus (use lube to assist), and gently squeeze the bulb. When the bulb is empty, remove the douche and expel the water into the toilet. Your goal is to repeat this process until the water runs clear, which should take no more than three to five passes.
While effective, douching is not necessary. For most people, defecating an hour prior to intercourse and a good scrub in the shower should do the trick. If you’re so bold, use a lubricated finger to feel around for any pesky lingerers.
So there you have it, the education on butt stuff that our schools and society conveniently forgot to teach us. Now, with this knowledge under your belt, we encourage you to explore the many splendors of anal play, not only because it can feel fantastic and offers new and exciting ways to experience pleasure, but also because butts are universal––we all have them!